June 15, 2026
“I haven’t ever really found a place that I call home” — an old Dido song… one that mirrors my sentiments right now.
I’ve been asked a few times why I’m traveling, and I can’t quite seem to land on a solid answer.
Sometimes I go explore, see sights, and take pictures, but that isn’t for me. It’s a way to open up communication from the people in my life — message-baiting, one might say… or engagement-baiting. It’s just a way to remind people that I’m still alive, and I think that’s important.
Personally, I have little to no interest in ancient mosques, churches, and temples. So, that can’t be my reason for traveling.
I’ve already found the answer to my question: “are people who I think they are?” People are the same no matter where they’re from. We’re all trying to live, love, and survive. The differences are mostly induced by political forces and those few in power. Most people are lovely. So, that can’t be my reason anymore.
It’s true… America is too expensive and poisonous — certainly a valid reason to escape.
It’s why I liked Morocco. It was extremely cheap and slightly less poisonous. If only it were a little bit more green, people would flock there. Portugal was reasonably green with plants and trees, but much more expensive. So, am I just looking for something affordable?
That’s half of it.
The other half is a feeling.
A friend once asked me what I’m looking for in a significant other. There’s a lot of logical things you can say, but really … love has always been illogical. The times I’ve been smitten with the butterflies have been acts of nature, not an act of man. I’m looking for that. I’m looking for a feeling. Someone… some place that feels like home.
I had a dream this morning about Siobhan, the barista who rejected me. I was just talking to her, and instead of dismissing or ignoring me, she smiled and responded back. I was surprised, and I felt elated.
Is that all it takes? This elusive feeling I’m searching for seems so simple yet so far away. But, with every plane ticket… with every train ride, I get closer and closer to home.
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